The first ‘official’ task my Dom gave me was to write my own personal A-Z of BDSM. He was very clear that I wasn’t to research at all when putting it together, it had to be about my experience &/or knowledge of the topic. I could come to him for help if I was having difficulty with it, perhaps struggling to come up with a word or activity for a particular letter, and he would try give me ideas. Google however was banned completely.
I was practically bouncing off the sofa in excitement at this point. A task! A real live task, I could get my teeth into! I love to write, and I love anything that gets my brain working, or more accurately directs my brain’s constant restless pacing towards something specific. Not to mention I love all things BDSM related. Well not love exactly, they all interest me though. Even those things that make me wrinkle up my nose & think to myself ‘how on earth is that sexy/appealing/fun’, I find all aspects interesting from an intellectual point of view.
I happily got to work on it, the deadline gave me around 2 weeks to complete it. Some of the letters had easy and obvious choices for me, and I rattled through 3-4 entries per day at first. I would pass it to Sir every day to read my updates, and we’d talk about many of the entries. It really was a great way for him to get a feel for my knowledge; and for both of us to have some good discussions on a wide range of activities. It also gave him several laughs too, though can’t say I really meant to be funny …. [side note – do you need a day off Sir?] In many ways it was a pre-cursor to creating a full limit list for me too.
The task did get harder towards the end, as I’d tackled the subjects I either knew most about, or felt most passionately about – be it negative or positive feelings. There was some very creative thinking employed for a few letters too – I mean.. X & Z??!!
As an exercise for me it was incredibly thought provoking at times too. I know a lot of my entries had heaps of contradictions in them, something he spotted right away, and really showed my lack of real experience. Well lack of experience & a mind that he likens to a butterfly, flitting one way & then another, with no apparent logic involved at all!
By the time the task was completed I had spent hours thinking of, and writing about, all sorts of aspects of BDSM that I might not otherwise have given much thought to. Likewise, Sir & I had spent a lot of time discussing those topics, helping us both understand each other better, and setting the tone for the incredibly open communication we share.
Having since looked online for similar A-Z’s (and no, I didn’t cheat and google earlier!) I haven’t found many, though there is one on the Wiki. So I talked to Sir & he has agreed that I can publish my own here on my blog. I’ll probably put them up weekly so look out for the first entry appearing soon.